This article was generated with the support of AI and reviewed by an editor for factual accuracy and satirical tone.
The fossil fuel fanfiction nobody asked for is back: Shell might finally devour BP — in what could become the biggest unholy alliance since, well… Shell and apartheid South Africa.
That’s right: after years of flirting and fumbling, the dirtiest merger fantasy in Big Oil is once again swirling through boardrooms and Bloomberg alerts.
Why now? Because activist hedge fund Elliott Management just bought a nearly 5% stake in BP and immediately demanded a boardroom bloodletting. Cue another round of speculation that Shell, Chevron, ADNOC, or some other oil-drunk conglomerate might swoop in and “rescue” BP from its decade-long identity crisis. read more
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Posted in: Big Oil, BlackRock, BlackRock Advisors UK, BlackRock Fund Advisors, BP, Business ethics, Business Principles, Chevron, Climate Change, Environment, Exxon Mobil, Fossil Fuels, GoogleNews, Greenwash, Hakluyt & Co, Hakluyt & Company, Human Rights, John Donovan, Oil, Oil Spill, Royal Dutch Shell Plc, Shell Business Principles, Shell PLC, Sin Stocks, Vanguard Global Advisers LLC, Vanguard Group.
Tagged: BP · Chevron · Environment · ExxonMobil · John Donovan · Oil · Royal Dutch Shell Plc · Shell
This article was generated with the support of AI and reviewed by an editor for factual accuracy and satirical tone.
Shell, the ultimate sin stock and world-class carbon distributor, has found a new home for its latest North Sea alliance — in a building that sounds more like a Bond villain’s lair than a climate strategy hub: The Silver Fin.
Yes, the Shell–Equinor joint venture is officially moving into Union Street, Aberdeen, where the only thing deeper than the oil reserves is the irony. read more
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Posted in: BlackRock, BlackRock Advisors UK, BlackRock Fund Advisors, Climate Change, Environment, Fossil Fuels, GoogleNews, Greenwash, John Donovan, Oil, Royal Dutch Shell Plc, Shell North Sea, Shell North Sea Platforms, Sin Stocks, Vanguard Global Advisers LLC, Vanguard Group.
This article was generated with the support of AI and reviewed by an editor for factual accuracy and satirical tone.
In a move that screams “accessibility” while quietly dodging accountability, Shell plc, the world’s leading expert in pollution, profit, and PR spin, has announced that its 2025 Annual General Meeting (AGM) will take place on May 20, 2025, at 10:00 UK time — live from the Sofitel London Heathrow Hotel.
Yes, Shell’s AGM will happen next to a major carbon-emitting transport hub — a fitting metaphor for a company that has spent decades turning fossil fuels into shareholder dividends and climate collapse. read more
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Posted in: Alfred Rosenberg, BlackRock, BlackRock Fund Advisors, Climate Change, Environment, Fossil Fuels, GoogleNews, John Donovan, Royal Dutch Shell Plc, Shell AGM, Shell PLC, Sin Stocks, Vanguard Global Advisers LLC, Vanguard Group.
Tagged: Environment · John Donovan · Litigation · Royal Dutch Shell Plc · Shell
Shell — the world’s favourite greenwashing juggernaut — is once again proving that its true superpower isn’t drilling oil. It’s drilling holes in the tax system. It’s merger mania, and while executives claim it’s about “scale” and “flexibility in a declining basin,” every tax lawyer and banker worth their bonus knows the real prize: huge future profits with minimal tax bills.
Posted By John Donovan: 15 April 2025
In a move that would make even the most shameless tax accountant blush, Shell and its oily comrades have been busy merging their way out of billions in tax liabilities across the North Sea — all while crying about how unfair their taxes are.
Because when you’re one of the most profitable polluters on Earth, nothing screams “innovation” like ducking your fiscal responsibilities through creative accounting.
💸 Mergers That Smell Like Money (Saved)
Here’s the scheme — sorry, “strategy” — in action: read more
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Posted in: Big Oil, BlackRock, BlackRock Advisors UK, BlackRock Fund Advisors, Business Principles, Eni, Environment, Fossil Fuels, Gas, GoogleNews, Greenwashing, John Donovan, Oil, Pollution, Royal Dutch Shell Plc, Shell, Shell North Sea, Shell PLC.
Tagged: Arctic Ocean · Environment · John Donovan · Oil · Royal Dutch Shell Plc · Shell
With BP’s share price looking like an oil-slicked fish gasping on a beach, merger rumours are back, and Shell is the leading suitor. Promises or Buyout Prospects?
Big Oil’s Mid-Life Crisis Is Now a Merger Fantasy. Spoiler: The Planet Still Loses.
Inspired by the CNBC article: “Oil giant BP is seen as a prime takeover target. Is a blockbuster mega-merger in the cards?”
Identity Crisis: BP’s Backslide to the Black Stuff
Once a wannabe climate champion, has now slammed into reverse, ditching renewables and chasing oil profits like it’s 1974. CEO Murray Auchincloss calls it a “strategic reset,” but let’s be honest — it’s a greenwash rinse cycle followed by a fossil-fuel binge.
“BP will slash renewable spending and boost oil and gas investment,”
Auchincloss said in February, adding that this pivot is attracting “significant interest” in BP’s non-core assets. read more
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Posted in: Big Oil, BlackRock, BlackRock Advisors UK, BlackRock Fund Advisors, BP, Climate Change, Environment, GoogleNews, John Donovan, Oil, Royal Dutch Shell Plc, Shell PLC, Sin Stocks, United States, Vanguard Global Advisers LLC, Vanguard Group, Wall Street Journal.
Tagged: BP · Environment · Oil · Royal Dutch Shell Plc · Shell
Trump Yanks Licenses. Shell Shrugs. BlackRock Still Gets Paid. The Planet? Not So Lucky.
Just when you thought the fossil fuel absurdity couldn’t dig any deeper, the Trump Administration comes through with another shovel — this time revoking key gas project licenses for Shell, , and Chevron in Venezuelan waters.
Yes, that’s right: Shell’s dream of extracting gas from Venezuela’s Dragon field and piping it into Trinidad and Tobago’s export terminals is now on pause — or, if history teaches us anything, permanently flushed down the crude-soaked toilet of geopolitical fantasy. read more
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Posted in: Big Oil, BlackRock, BlackRock Advisors UK, BlackRock Fund Advisors, BP, Business ethics, Chevron, Climate Change, Environment, Fossil Fuels, Gas, GoogleNews, John Donovan, Oil, Pollution, President Trump, Royal Dutch Shell Plc, Shell PLC, Sin Stocks, Vanguard Global Advisers LLC, Vanguard Group.
Deep Water, Deeper Denial: Shell Touts New Oil Bonanza While Pretending It’s a Climate Solution
BREAKING: Shell has struck again — not in court, not in a human rights investigation, but 7,500 feet under the Gulf of Mexico, where the planet’s least-needed project just came online: Dover, a lovely little climate time-bomb producing up to 20,000 barrels of oil equivalent per day.
Yes, Shell is back at it, extracting hydrocarbons with a smile, calling it “lower carbon” because… well, it’s not from coal, and that apparently counts for something in ESG bingo.
“Shell continues to unlock more value from the prolific basins in our portfolio,” read more
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Posted in: Big Oil, BlackRock, BlackRock Advisors UK, BlackRock Fund Advisors, Business ethics, Canada, Chris Finlayson, Climate Change, Fossil Fuels, Gas, GoogleNews, Greenwashing, Gulf of Mexico, John Donovan, Oil, President Trump, Royal Dutch Shell Plc, Shell PLC, Sin Stocks, Vanguard Global Advisers LLC, Vanguard Group.
Tagged: Environment · Gulf of Mexico · John Donovan · Oil · Royal Dutch Shell Plc · Shell
Because Nothing Says “Energy Security” Like Betting on Shell, PDVSA, and Political Chaos All at Once
In a move that could only shock people who’ve been asleep since 2017, the Trump administration has revoked licenses for oil supermajors Shell and to operate natural gas projects offshore Venezuela. That’s right—just when the fossil fuel giants thought they could sneak more gas profits out of South America, boom, the U.S. pulled the plug.
🪓 From Greenlights to Guillotines: The Venezuela Whiplash
The revoked licenses affect gas projects linked to Trinidad and Tobago, which had planned to partner with Shell on the Dragon gas field, and with BP on the Cocuina-Manakin project. These projects were hyped as essential for “energy security in the Caribbean.” Because obviously, trusting Venezuela’s PDVSA and Shell to safeguard the region’s future was a totally sound strategy. read more
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Posted in: Big Oil, BlackRock, BlackRock Advisors UK, BlackRock Fund Advisors, BP, Fossil Fuels, GoogleNews, John Donovan, Royal Dutch Shell Plc, Shell PLC, Sin Stocks, Vanguard Global Advisers LLC, Vanguard Group.
Sober Reflection
For over two decades, John Donovan has published articles on RoyalDutchShellPlc.com, relentlessly documenting Shell’s alleged misdeeds — from corporate espionage and environmental devastation to human rights violations and greenwashing on an industrial scale.
Some might ask: Can this all really be true? Could one of the world’s most powerful corporations, backed by billions in revenue and a global network of lawyers, really be this corrupt, this ruthless, and still get away with it?
Here’s something worth pondering: read more
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Posted in: Business ethics, Business Principles, Climate Change, Environment, Fossil Fuels, GoogleNews, Greenwashing, Human Rights, John Donovan, Litigation, Pollution, Royal Dutch Shell Plc, Shell PLC.
Tagged: Environment · John Donovan · Litigation · Royal Dutch Shell Plc · Shell
Pennsylvania Got a Toxic Temple Instead of Jobs — But Hey, BlackRock’s Still Cashing Dividends
Somewhere along the Ohio River, Shell built its shining monument to climate denial and capitalist overkill: an ethane cracker plant that turns fracked gas into plastic — because what the world clearly needs right now is more plastic.
Locals were promised an economic renaissance. What they got instead?
Foul air, poisoned water, 33 environmental violations, and the scent of yet another Shell masterclass in corporate betrayal.
“I have to live in a cocoon year-round,”
said local resident Nadine Luci, who probably didn’t envision her American Dream involving respiratory issues, constant dread, and chemically laced air fresheners. read more
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Posted in: BlackRock, BlackRock Advisors UK, BlackRock Fund Advisors, Business ethics, Climate Change, Environment, Fossil Fuels, GoogleNews, Human Rights, Immoral, John Donovan, Pennsylvania Shell ethylene cracker plant, Plastics Recycling, Pollution, Royal Dutch Shell Plc, Shell Business Principles, Shell Chemicals, Shell PLC, Sin Stocks.
Tagged: Pennsylvania Shell ethylene cracker plant · Royal Dutch Shell Plc · Shell
Oil Giant Faces High Court While Still Dodging Accountability Like It’s a Sport
LONDON, APRIL 2025 — It’s the trial that should make your blood boil (unless it’s already poisoned with benzene, in which case you may want to sue Shell). In a London courtroom lined with empty bookcases—symbolic, perhaps, of Shell’s moral library—two Nigerian communities are fighting for the basic right to drink water that doesn’t cause cancer.
Shell? They’re fighting tooth and nail to avoid handing over documents that might reveal what they knew, when they knew it, and how long they sat on their gold-plated hands while entire ecosystems died in oil-soaked silence. read more
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Posted in: BlackRock, BlackRock Advisors UK, BlackRock Fund Advisors, Business ethics, Business Principles, Defamation, Environment, Fossil Fuels, GoogleNews, Hakluyt & Co, Hakluyt & Company, John Donovan, Ken Saro-Wiwa, Leigh Day, Litigation, MI6, Niger Delta, Nigeria, Ogoni, Oil, Oil Spill, Pollution, Royal Dutch Shell Plc, Shell PLC, Shell Spies, Shell Spying, Sin Stocks, Toxic contamination, Vanguard Global Advisers LLC, Vanguard Group.
Tagged: Environment · John Donovan · Litigation · Niger Delta · Nigeria · Oil · Royal Dutch Shell Plc · Shell
🤡 Unplanned Maintenance, Cyclones, and a Whole Lot of Fossil Fuel Fantasy
Just when you thought Shell Plc might start taking the climate crisis seriously, they drop a fresh load of fossil-fueled optimism—while their gas output slumps and their climate credibility melts faster than Arctic ice in a heatwave.
In a new “trading update” (read: PR gloss-over), Shell confessed that natural gas and LNG production in the first quarter of 2025 was—gasp!—lower than expected. The reason? Oh, just some “unplanned maintenance” in Australia and “cyclones.” You know, the kinds of weather events that are becoming more frequent because of companies like Shell. read more
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Posted in: Australia, BlackRock, BlackRock Advisors UK, BlackRock Fund Advisors, Business ethics, Climate Change, Environment, Fossil Fuels, Gas, Gas-to-liquids, GoogleNews, John Donovan, LNG, Oil, Pollution, Royal Dutch Shell Plc, Shell PLC, Sin Stocks, Vanguard Global Advisers LLC, Vanguard Group, Wael Sawan.
Pension Funds Say “Excuse Us… What is Shell Smoking?”
While most of the planet’s population is wondering whether their homes will still exist in 25 years, Shell is out here fantasizing about growing its liquefied natural gas (LNG) business by a whopping 30% by the end of the decade. Because apparently, nothing says “climate responsibility” like expanding fossil fuel infrastructure with a half-life longer than your retirement savings.
Luckily, some people still have functioning moral compasses — and, you know, fiduciary duties.
💼 Pensions vs. Profiteers read more
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Posted in: John Donovan.
Shell Games: Oil Slicks, Exploding Death Boats, and the Whistleblower They’d Rather You Forget
Here we go again. Shell—the ethical oil behemoth that brought you climate chaos, fiery floating gas factories, and ocean-wide slicks the size of small countries—is under fire once more. And what do you know? It’s not just a fluke or a rogue pipe. It’s a pattern. A very expensive, very dangerous, and very preventable pattern of catastrophic negligence—and the people trying to stop it keep getting burned. Literally and professionally.
The Bonga Spill: “Oops” Doesn’t Quite Cover It
Let’s rewind to December 2011. Off the coast of Nigeria, Shell’s pride and joy, the Bonga FPSO (Floating Production Storage and Offloading vessel), decided it was time to vomit 40,000 barrels of crude oil into the Atlantic. Over 685 square miles of shimmering disaster followed, making it one of Nigeria’s worst spills in a decade. Shell took hours to stop the leak after their crew noticed that more oil was disappearing than arriving. Genius. read more
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Posted in: Australia, Australian National Offshore Petroleum and Environmental Management Authority, BlackRock, BlackRock Advisors UK, BlackRock Fund Advisors, Business ethics, Environment, Fossil Fuels, Gas, Gas-to-liquids, GoogleNews, Irina Woodhead, John Donovan, Leaked Shell Emails, Litigation, Michael Crothers, Niger Delta, Nigeria, Oil Spill, Prelude FLNG Project, Prelude Toxic Headlines, Royal Dutch Shell Plc, Shell, Shell Employee Safety, Shell Oil Reserves Scandal, Shell PLC, Shell Project Delays, Shell Project Overruns, Sin Stocks.
Tagged: Australia · Environment · Gas · Irina Woodhead · Litigation · Niger Delta · Nigeria · Royal Dutch Shell Plc · Shell
Enter Irina Woodhead, a former Shell technical safety engineer who had the audacity to suggest that maybe—just maybe—ignoring safety protocols on a floating gas bomb was a bad idea. She raised concerns about Prelude’s emergency protocols, only to be shown the door faster than you can say “whistleblower retaliation.
Ah, Shell. The oil-stained poster child of unhinged corporate greed, environmental catastrophe, and staggering audacity. Alongside its equally charming BFFs ExxonMobil and Chevron, Shell is now losing its ever-loving mind over a radical, totally outlandish proposal: that some of the gas they’re hoarding and shipping offshore might actually be used to keep Australians warm and the lights on.
You know, in Australia. Where the gas comes from.
But don’t worry, Shell’s top brass is here to explain why that’s a very bad idea—for them, obviously. read more
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Posted in: Australia, Australian National Offshore Petroleum and Environmental Management Authority, Big Oil, BlackRock, BlackRock Advisors UK, BlackRock Fund Advisors, Chevron, Exxon, Exxon Mobil, Fossil Fuels, Gas, GoogleNews, Hacking attack, Human Rights, Irina Woodhead, Litigation, LNG, Prelude FLNG Project, Prelude Toxic Headlines, Royal Dutch Shell Plc, Shell Chemicals, Shell Employee Safety, Shell Lifeboats, Shell PLC, Sin Stocks.
Tagged: Australia · Chevron · ExxonMobil · Gas · LNG · Shell · Shell Prelude FLNG
Ah, Shell—the oil-slicked titan of greed, pollution, and profit-before-planet whose moral compass seems to point straight to the nearest offshore tax haven. You’d think this global goliath of carbon chaos would be comfortably lounging atop its pile of petrodollars. But no, even they aren’t safe from Wall Street’s cold, calculating buzzards. Enter Elliott Management: the hedge fund equivalent of a vulture on steroids, now circling Shell like it’s a wounded gazelle.
Yes, Elliott—Paul Singer’s merciless American juggernaut of “activist investing” (read: financial warfare)—has just shorted Shell to the tune of £850 million. That’s 0.5% of Shell’s stock, making it the biggest short against the FTSE 100 oil giant in nearly a decade. When Elliott smells weakness, it doesn’t just poke the bear. It sells the bear’s fur in advance and sues the forest. read more
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Posted in: Big Oil, BlackRock, BlackRock Advisors UK, BlackRock Fund Advisors, BP, Business ethics, Business Principles, Climate Change, Environment, Fossil Fuels, Gas, GoogleNews, Oil, Royal Dutch Shell Plc, Shell PLC, Sin Stocks, Vanguard Global Advisers LLC, Vanguard Group, Wael Sawan.
Tagged: BP · Environment · Royal Dutch Shell Plc · Shell
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